Thoughts On Radical Compassion

And why people act the way they do.

I understand radical compassion not as some hippy dippy fuzzy good feeling thing but as a logical outcome of science.

We know a lot more about why people behave the way they do thanks to modern, trauma-attentive biology, psychology and sociology. And my experience is that having this knowledge really makes compassion kind of an obvious outcome.

There are no good or bad people in this world. 

There are just bodies that, due to their socialization, culture, experiences, genetics, somatic shaping, and current incentives, find it easier to think, feel and behave in one way versus another.

When we understand that people operate based on what feels the most survivable and usually what is most embodied (deeply habitual) for them, most behavior is no longer surprising.

Of course there's going to be some people who are extremely freaked out and offended by having to wear masks in public.

Of course there are people who are homophobic.

Of course that kid is a bully.

Of course you continue to stay in unhealthy, toxic relationships.

Of course people get into bar fights over dumb shit.

Of course there are people who join the Proud Boys.

I may not like the behavior. I may not agree with it morally. The behavior may cross my boundaries or directly harm me or people I know.

I don't have to like it to understand it. I don't have to agree with it to have compassion for where it comes from. 

Sometimes I'm extremely puzzled and I cannot put myself in shoes of certain behaviors, of course.

But I'm no longer BAFFLED.

Sometimes I feel enraged and frustrated. But these days, more often I'm just curious and sad, and motivated to learn more and find ways to bring more healing into the world.

I'm not here to label people as good or bad, particularly because that literally does nothing to prevent, repair, or transform. The judgement aspect is superfluous.

I'm here to understand why people do what they do and what factors need to change in order to reduce harmful, violent and ineffective behavior in the world, from regular individuals to people in power to governments and institutions.